No Leftovers!

Last night we were supposed to have leftover lentil soup for dinner. Thaaaat didn't happen.  It was really yummy! And I was excited to have a new recipe that was vegetarian and diabetic friendly turn out so good, but poor Danny bit into a clove and that turned him off to the stuff. Then I had visiting teach right at 6 and by the time I finished we were both starving and wanted nothing to do with the leftovers… but wanted everything to do with our favorite mexican food restaurant on that side of town. I'm not mad at myself for eating it i'm just … irritated because it wasn't worth it. I had done so well for the rest of that day and our mexican food caused me to gain a full pound. Ya. Really, my body is like that. I will gain an entire pound in one day if I go over my calories or indulge in even a little bit of whatever.

Today I only ate foods within my good food list but lost track of my calories. And for some reason I was SO HUNGRY all day! So i'm not sure where i'm at exactly but we had chicken cabbage salad for dinner and I have a pretty good feeling i'm on the safe side for today. Cabbage is my friend.  I can eat lots of it and it is just crazy low in calories.

You know all of those people that say you can eat whatever you want and lose weight because "Oh I just counted the calories and bla bla .." well I think that's crap. Because if I give up lunch for a treat that's high in calories i'll be too hungry. If I eat 3 meals a day and two snacks all packed with nutrient rich, low calorie, good foods that my body needs to be healthy there isn't any ROOM for any of that stuff in my daily calorie limit! Just saying.

I walked with Rowan again this morning.  I had some wardrobe malfunctions that made it interesting.  I wore spandex pants that'd been too stretched out running errands the day before and so they kept falling off haha! It is so difficult to admit how out of shape I am.  I have truly been too lazy. Ya, I can point to lots of reasons for being that way… but.. I don't want to anymore.  I walked with him for 30 min. Just walked. And I was exhausted. I decided that this time i'd walk as quickly as possible and walk until I felt super pooped… and THEN i'd turn around. So that i'd have to push myself to keep going and get back home! I feel that the stroller pulled me. I I thought about sitting on the side of the road in some shade a couple of times, but I didn't … man! I see people much bigger than I am who have so much more endurance and strength than I do! It's abosolutely discouraging and disheartening. But I really am determined to keep at it. 3x a week. Just work on getting out there that often. I tried to do some sprints again today but we don't have a jogging stroller and it didn't handle going quickly well at all. The wheels would vibrate.  I found a decent one on Craig's list for 40$ I am going to go look at when we get paid. Oh! So I picked something up along the side of the road during our walk today! A hardback copy ofThe Lord of the Rings! I kind of laughed and had the thought that it was God's way of rewarding me for my efforts. And then my very next thought was.. how did this really get here? Did one kid throw another kids book out of the bus window? hmm…
I got an infection again and have been on an antibiotic that makes me pretty sick. I have to take it in the morning and at night. I had been doing so well at avoiding antibiotics. Sigh. Anyway I realized that when I felt like I may hurl on our last walk it was probably the meds. So I waiting to take them until after our walk today. I mixed up some overnight oats in an almost empty almond butter jar to enjoy when I got home too! Silly Rowan. I fed him blueberry pancakes before we left and he didn't touch them. But as soon as we get home he was picking up his cereal from yesterday off of the floor and munching it! Sigh.. I guess it's really my fault it's there anyway haha!

I've taken a few pics of myself, last week and this week. Even though my weight hasn't gone down a lot I feel like my stomach isn't as bloated and big.  And I could see it in the pics so that's progress!

Rowan has been enjoying our morning walks. I feel better getting him out of the house. He's always so devastated when we get home and I put the stroller away in the closet. He's devastated a lot lately. If you set him down, tell him no, go to the bathroom, shut a door, don't let him mess with the dials on the dishwasher… oh boy. Danny keeps pointing out that he plays me a lot. Throws a fit and looks for my reaction. I feel like i'm getting mean though … because I tell him he can't have or do things and then he throws a fit and I ignore it. Sigh. It's that age. I want so badly for him to start using more signs.  He know's "all done" and does the sign and says it sometimes too. Tonight at dinner he was yelling from his chair because he'd finished. I told him to use his all done sign and showed him "all done all done!" He looked at me. Looked down. Thought about it.. thought about it… tried screaming again… and then finally did it.  So that's progress I guess. I  want him to see that he get's results when he makes the effort to communicate with sign instead of screaming. Boys. Love him.

Danny has started working nights. It is nice to have the car during the day but having him here sleeping makes my days feel weird. I'm less motivated in being productive. It feels like a sleepy saturday or something. And he's been irritated that he doesn't have down time. Hope it doesn't last long.